My heart feels so down. It's like aching. I probably dun even know the reason why. Maybe because of the living...or because of the dead? both i think. hm... maybe everybody should learn to be more careful with our words and quit gossiping and complaining. hmmm... or probably 21 jan is approaching. I admit I still miss him as a brother. It's been 2 years. And each time I pop by all-saints to visit him, I was just trying to hold back my tears. Each year before 21jan, things get gloomy. Well.. of course I know he's now in paradise. And I should be happy that he's out of sufferings. But I think it's human nature to feel sad, even after so many years. I remembered 2 years back.... As they played the powerpoint I've created, we sang his favourite song "God's abundant blessing" +"Amazing Grace". I've not shed as much tears as that day in my life. And experience insomia for 2 and a half weeks.. and did not eat a thing for 2 weeks. This year, I've got him a handmade mini soccer ball.Well.. just to decorate his small little place.. that's all. heiya!! I think i should stop talking about him. Makes me feel more down... chaoz.